Once we accept that they are just stories we tell ourselves, then we can truly begin to heal. My stories go a little something like this: “I’m not good enough. Instead of shedding a negative light on ourselves, we need to look for a positive spin. I’m too fat.” I know these stories are common, and many others have experienced the same ones. We are the stories we tell ourselves. Required fields are marked *. Your email address will not be published. Together, we can master your story. We create stories to define our existence. Once we believe these stories as true, it is difficult to change our minds and believe differently. ( Log Out / I can’t be stable, my entire family is dysfunctional. As humans, we tend to focus on the bad stories and become trapped in those. Too often, as adults we miss this fact. In this universe, and this existence, where we live with this duality of whether we exist or not and who are we, the stories we tell ourselves are the stories that define the potentialities of our existence. These stories can come in all sorts of chapters, but vary from “being ugly” to “I’m not good enough,” and so much more. So, how can we go about changing our stories to a more positive one? Once we accept that they are just stories we tell ourselves, then we can truly begin to heal. So, I will go further, and I say, “I tell a story, and therefore I exist.” I exist because there are stories, and if there are no stories, we don’t exist. We are the stories we tell ourselves. We humans have a tendency to resort to storytelling in order to cope with the stressors in our lives. I can’t achieve that lifelong goal, I’m just not wired that way. So, how do we break free of the stories we are telling ourselves and what, in reality, are these stories? ( Log Out / The thing is, that’s exactly what they are, stories. Search. ( Log Out / But, just think – what would happen if I told myself a positive story instead? We become trapped in the fictional story we have created and it causes us distress, feelings of anxiousness, and even depression. Learn how your comment data is processed. I’m a horrible mother. Is it possible to change our negative stories to a positive one? If you still feel like you are telling yourself disempowering stories, or need help to redefine your story, create a new one, or for someone to talk to because you are feeling down, please contact us or call us on 8888701775 and talk to one of our therapists about it. Your email address will not be published. It is hard to let go of these stories and sometimes they have become so ingrained in us that we have lost sight of the truth that is right in front of us – it’s just a fictional story. Each moment of our life is a chapter in the story we are living, and some of these chapters are good, and others are bad. What is social anxiety and where can you receive treatment for it in Chicago, Illinois and Iowa? These stories and the effects they have are so important that there is now a new study in psychological research called “narrative psychology“. In life, no one impacts our stories but ourselves. Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. I’m a recovering alcoholic. In the realm of mental health, it’s about changing our perspective from negative to positive. The way we react to a situation, the way we talk to ourselves, and the way we are with others are all our decisions to be made. This is the problem with the stories we tell ourselves. How do we learn how to utilize the stories we have created to master our lives? …we are the stories we tell ourselves. Once that happens, it’s hard to find out what the truth really is or even was to begin with. The four basic characters: the Victim, the Spectator, the Villain, and the Hero, Quarantine Binge: Netflix’s “Into the Night”. In life, we tend to create stories about “who we are”. A story is the relationship that you develop between who you are, or who you potentially are, and the infinite world, and that’s our mythology. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. When mental health issues arise, it is because the stories we have created about ourselves are clashing with reality or it is because we have come to believe in these destructive stories, no matter how untrue they may be. We tell our stories, and a person without a story does not exist... everybody, has a story that they follow. The stories we tell ourselves matter. In this universe, and this existence, where we live with this duality of whether we exist or not and who are we, the stories we tell ourselves are the stories that define the potentialities of our existence. Planning how to cope next time you are mentally overloaded, Retreats / Intensives / Couples Bootcamps. We have the control, and through consistent practice, we can master the story. So that’s as wide as we look at stories. I’m a Borderline. I can’t declutter my home, I’m just a messy person. It’s even harder to put a positive spin on our stories. These “stories” are not necessarily true, but they are the ones we have constructed and sadly, come to believe. Or we get so used to the same stories over and over again, we forget that we get to write our own. Give a Man a Mask and He'll Tell You the Truth? Change ), You are commenting using your Facebook account. And the stories we allow others to tell us about ourselves matter as well. We must make an entire mind change, and the above steps can help to push us into the right direction. Most of the time, they are negative and that impacts our mental health greatly. Your email address will not be published. The Invisible Famine in The Parable of the Prodigal Son. We create stories to define our existence. Instead of “I’m not good enough” say, “I am good enough, but I’m struggling at the moment.”, Instead of “I’m a recovering alcoholic” say, “I’m a survivor of an addiction and I’m feeling overwhelmed at the moment.”, Instead of “I’m a Borderline” say, “I have a mental health disorder, but that doesn’t define who I am.”, Instead of “I’m a horrible mother” say, “My kids are happy and I’m trying my best, but I’m overwhelmed at the moment.”, Instead of “I’m too fat” say, “I need to get back to eating healthy and working out again, because it makes me feel better.”. and a person without a story does not exist. It’s easy to say, “just be more positive,” but how can that actually be achieved? Change ), You are commenting using your Google account. Here are five thoughts on how to change your story, to create a more positive outlook, and to start mastering the life you truly want: Taking the negative stories we tell ourselves and making them positive is only the beginning to a long road of nurturing our mental health. Change ), the stories we tell ourselves are the stories. We tell ourselves stories. ( Log Out / I have told myself many stories over the past years. Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com. The way we react to a situation, the way we talk to ourselves, and the way we are with others are all our decisions to be made. The stories I tell myself are negative, which is what happens more often than not. We can then learn how to live our new stories and use them to create a better and healthier alternative. Some examples of putting a positive spin on the story could be: Can you see how the positive spin can help to change our story? In life, no one impacts our stories but ourselves. Oftentimes, these stories can be embellished and the person telling the story begins to live the story, even if it’s not true. If we do not create the stories, we probably go mad.-Shekhar Kapur, Ted India, 2009.
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