And when we're done, I don't wanna feel my legs. Why going running with your partner could strengthen your relationship, How to cope with the fact the pandemic may go on for an indefinite length of time, Mums open up about the damaging mental health impact of following mummy bloggers. Because that was one of the main fear-factors, that I had no future – that it was just going to be clouded with scary thoughts and feelings of hopelessness. They will not offer advice, or tell you what to do – they are simply there to listen. The overwhelming feelings of mental illness that I was living with at the time were just too much for me. It felt like a never-ending cycle of fear and intrusive thoughts. I feel like this is such a common misconception with suicidal thoughts, like it’s something you only think about if you think nobody loves you. Because that’s how I felt: hopeless and empty. But I didn’t want to die. I know all of the above, and I didn’t deny it to anyone who repeated it to me – but that wasn’t the problem. With the help of the Crisis team and Samaritans, eventually, the suicidal feelings lessened. It is run by volunteers who are on hand to listen 24 hours a day. For many months, I felt suicidal. At its worst, I planned it out. Also, deep down, I didn’t really want to die. Here are part of the lyrics, it's a rock/metal type of song....."I'll do what it takes to make you believe.....we do what we want ...". And when were done, I don’t wanna feel my legs And when were done, I just wanna feel your hands all over me baby You can’t stop there, music still playin’ in the background And you’re almost there You can do it, I believe in you baby So close from here So baby I’mma be your motivation Go, go, go, go Motivation Go, go, go, go [Trey Songz] Any help would be cool...you can hear part of it from a YouTube video I really didn’t want to continue to live the way I was living anymore. You can call them on 116 123, or email them at jo@samaritans.org. When we're done I don't wanna feel my legs Musician/Band The fear of the unknown of what happens after death was too overwhelming, and I panicked that I might make an attempt and regret it and then it’d be too late. How to cope if you feel like you're existing rather than living at the moment, How three UK businesses are preparing to transition out of the EU, Why winter is the perfect time to work out – plus five exercises you can do wherever and whatever the weather, What to do if you’re suffering with a weaker ‘working from home bladder’, Teenager suffers burns across face and body after head lice shampoo catches fire, How having my large intestine removed in emergency surgery triggered my OCD. Enjoy the videos and music you love, upload original content, and share it all with friends, family, and the world on YouTube. I talk. Talking did help. And although sometimes it’s hard to do so – I’m glad that I do. I was so down that I didn’t think I’d ever escape the feelings, but I was wrong. Confide in someone you trust: a friend, a family member, or your GP – who will be able to guide you on next steps to receiving help. Although I wasn’t 100% sure I wanted to die, the 80% of me that felt like giving up was enough to force me to get help. With me, I had a loving family, a supportive partner and good friends. Lyrics to 'Feel' by Robbie Williams: Come on hold my hand I wanna contact the living Not sure I understand This role I've been given It’s incredibly difficult when you feel like you don’t want to live anymore, but you also don’t want to die. I got help from the Crisis team, an emergency mental health team who ensure you are not a risk to yourself, and I called Samaritans. It got to a point where I felt I was living so miserably that I questioned the point in life at all. Where I would do it, when I would do it and whether it was something I really wanted.
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